Author Topic: Greatest Lies in Aviation!  (Read 23661 times)

Offline FlyingBlind

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2006, 01:52:23 PM »
Ladies and Gentelmen ,if you look out of the right window ,you can see that the right engine has stopped working ,and if you run to the left window ,you can see that the left one istn either ,and now if you run fast back to the right one ,you can see our brave crew parachuting to safety ,have a nice landing

Offline KELPkid

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #16 on: January 25, 2006, 08:59:09 PM »
How about this one:

"Yes, Mr. FAA Ramp Inspector, I was instrument current, night current, and flight current, and the plane had a VOR check in the last 30 days and all required inspections when I shot the VOR approach at night in actual IMC with my wife on board 10 minutes ago."  :P
If you keep the greasy side down and avoid the cumulus granitus, respect the MEAs and mind the needles, then a successful flight you will have

Offline FlyingBlind

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #17 on: January 25, 2006, 09:58:09 PM »


This a actual thing happened to me and my buddies in Ämari

Me : ok you guys ready ? Others : Yep ! Me : Ok ,lets go ! Panda : WAIIIIIT! Me : What ? Panda : i cant find my shovel!

We were doing a ,,jump-on-what-you-can'' jump ,i had a bucket :)
« Last Edit: January 25, 2006, 09:59:33 PM by Mike »

Offline Mike

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #18 on: January 26, 2006, 01:07:21 AM »
"Yes, Mr. FAA Ramp Inspector, I was instrument current, night current, and flight current, and the plane had a VOR check in the last 30 days and all required inspections when I shot the VOR approach at night in actual IMC with my wife on board 10 minutes ago." :P

Good one KELPkid! packed a bunch of lies in one sentence even...

How about this one (speaking of IFR):

"If we get a little lower I think we'll see the lights."

or another one from the maintenance world:

"We shipped the part yesterday."

(HA HA, this is one of my favorites, but not when it really happens to me)
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fireflyr

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #19 on: January 26, 2006, 05:11:18 PM »
To the FSDO examiner:
DARN, I DID THREE PERFECT APPROACHES YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Offline Roland

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #20 on: January 26, 2006, 07:06:22 PM »
Engineer: “Any problems with this aircraft?”

Pilot: “No!”
If helicopter flying would be difficult, engineers would do it.

Offline FlyingBlind

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #21 on: January 26, 2006, 08:51:26 PM »
Engineer : So ,you do realize that you cant fly with that bird TODAY  Pilot : Yeah....

Offline Sleek-Jet

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #22 on: January 26, 2006, 10:47:33 PM »
... well... it's cheaper than women... :D

A pilot is a confused soul who talks about women when he's around airplanes, and airplanes when he's around women.

fireflyr

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #23 on: January 27, 2006, 12:42:59 AM »
HAHAHAHA----"cheaper than women"----What a sexist remark!!!----and how true!!!   Of course, the opposite is true for the aviators of the opposite sexual persuasion so "it's also cheaper than men"-----HAHAHAHA!!!

Offline Mike

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #24 on: January 27, 2006, 12:51:39 AM »
good one guys!

Maybe we should make a t-shirt series out of it or something with Chuck on it quoting all those lies...

and another one:

"All you have to do is follow the book." ;D
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Offline Firegirl

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #25 on: January 27, 2006, 03:56:20 AM »
HAHAHAHA----"cheaper than women"----What a sexist remark!!!----and how true!!!   Of course, the opposite is true for the aviators of the opposite sexual persuasion so "it's also cheaper than men"-----HAHAHAHA!!!

Heh heh heh....both are true.
If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet you could shoot beer out of you nose.  --- Jack Handy

Offline mdachs

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #26 on: January 27, 2006, 05:53:32 AM »
When flying commercial and the person sitting next too you asks if you could land the plane in an emergency:

Land?  Sure I can land it.  This 747 is a lot bigger then the 172 i fly, but when you get down to it, a plane is a plane.

 
or:

What kind of plane do I fly?  well,let me put it this way...you see that big one over there with 4 engines, thats a C-130....and i fly a C-172.... 

Offline Mike

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #27 on: January 28, 2006, 12:36:59 AM »

"Of course I did a thorough preflight! I always do.! ;)
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fireflyr

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #28 on: January 28, 2006, 12:43:42 PM »
Yes Sir, I'd be glad to be to instruct for your FBO and the wages are extremely fair!!!

Offline Ted_Stryker

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Re: Greatest Lies in Aviation!
« Reply #29 on: January 31, 2006, 06:36:14 PM »
"I meant to do that!"
We're going to have to come in pretty low!  It's just one of those things you have to do... when you land!  -- Ted Striker - Airplane!