Author Topic: Humor....I need Humor!  (Read 1384947 times)

airtac

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #915 on: April 07, 2007, 03:27:58 AM »
(And there's a reason women don't need to do the same...  ahem....)    ;)

OH YEAH-RIGHT !!!  Now yer goin' ta lecture us about virtuous behavior, morals, etc, etc.---- ::banghead::

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #916 on: April 07, 2007, 03:36:39 AM »
Hee hee hee hee HEEEEEE...........  I am sitting here LAUGHING...  just knew I could get a remark out of you Dear!!!!       :D

 ;)     ;)      ;)     ;)     ;)     ;)      ;)
Don't make me come back there!!!!

airtac

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #917 on: April 07, 2007, 03:45:32 AM »
Hee hee hee hee HEEEEEE...........  I am sitting here LAUGHING...  just knew I could get a remark out of you Dear!!!!       :D

 ;)     ;)      ;)     ;)     ;)     ;)      ;)
So you think you got me figured out you little devil !!! >:D >:D

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #918 on: April 07, 2007, 04:18:31 AM »
Oh, I never have men figured out -- I just tell myself I do!!!!!!!!!!!!!    ::bow::

Here's one I wish I would have thought of.......   it'd be good to do to the cars at work....   heh heh.................    >:D       >:D

Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline Frank N. O.

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #919 on: April 07, 2007, 01:51:31 PM »
I got a rough draft for a joke but I'm not sure if I created it or I heard it from some place but it goes like this: I just flew in from (insert a place long away from the setting of the joke) and man are my arms tired! (possible look or comment from the other person, depending on if it's a comic or written joke) Pilot again: Yeah my plane doesn't have an autopilot.
Of course for some here that's probably not a joke but a fact :D

Not really a joke but I was wondering, for those of you that have a mobile phone (aka cell-phone) do you have it playing the start of Danger Zone as a ring-signal? I can just picture it!  ::rofl::

And also, has anyone made a call in a pilot lounge for Lt. Pete Mitchell? (that's Maverick right?) Almost like the calls for Moe in The Simpsons (which were based on real prank-calls according to what I heard). Another nice one could be to play Danger Zone or the Top Gun anthem and see if any pilots reacted :D That reminds me of the scene in Hot Shots in the briefing where the pilots strikes poses with footballs, scarfs flying in the wind etc.  ::rofl::

Frank
« Last Edit: April 07, 2007, 01:55:06 PM by Frank N. O. »
"When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return."
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Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #920 on: April 10, 2007, 05:19:40 AM »
Frank, we had a pilot a few years ago who was, shall we say, rather enamored of HIMSELF, and always wore his flightsuit everywhere, so women (and everyone, really!) would know he was a PILOT.......  barf, barf....   ::loony::

He was a nice enough guy, but of course the guys labeled him "Maverick" and he was the unkowing recipient of a lot of jokes....  it's a long story, but "Maverick" isn't something any of our guys wants to be known as....   and he really did ask for 99% of it.   ;D 

   
Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #921 on: April 10, 2007, 05:23:21 AM »
Here's an Oldie but Goodie, from Air & Space Magazine.........

Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline BrianGMFS

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #922 on: April 10, 2007, 02:48:30 PM »
I was thinking of some of the funnier tricks and not so bright moments in my Fire/EMS/Aviation career. When I was on the Fire Dept. I'd have a new member help me with the weekly truck checks. the first think I'd do is tell them to go check the spark plugs on the ladder truck (which had a Diesel engine). after about 10 minutes they'd come back saying that there weren't any because it was a diesel (someone smart for a change) or that they were fine after crawling around under the hood looking for them (not the brightest light bulb in the pack ::loony:: ). I also had a Probie whom I asked to get me an axe, he made 3 laps around the truck looking for one. He came back and said there wasn't one on the truck. I said really?? as I nonchalantly walked up to the rear step of the pumper, reached out and removed the axe from it's mounting bracket. From the look on his face you would have thought I was Houdini and had produced an elephant from thin air  ::rofl::

When I worked on the ambulance, things got a little more creative. A good one was to sneak into another Dept's ambulance at the hospital and reset a few things. Most US built ambulances have a master battery switch that when shut off kills the entire electrical system in the truck. Sooooo, I'd make sure the switch was off, turn the defroster on high, all the warning lights on and put the siren on "Yelp" and walk away. When the crew returned to the ambulance they would usually hop in the cab and snap on the battery switch..... Resulting in an impressive sound and light show in the small ambulance garage/loading dock at the hospital ;D

One I had played on me was another crew used the white bandage tape to tape shut the drivers door on the rig, then took a black magic marker to draw the outline of the door to camouflage the tape (our ambulances were painted white) I reached up grabbed the door handle and promptly fell on my backside when I tried to open the door and it wouldn't budge. :P I figured out who did it and planned my revenge >:D I took a bag of IV solution, and set it under the left front tire. then I ran the tubing up the inside of the door so the end of the tube was pointed at the driver. As soon at the truck started to move a high pressure jet of saline sprayed the offending EMT in the face...... His Partner thought it was hilarious.... As did the ER staff ::rofl::

Brian


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Offline Firegirl

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #923 on: April 10, 2007, 06:46:54 PM »
Subject: Murphy's Law, et al

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will land on its sharp edge or roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.


Variation Law:
If you change lines or lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Law of the Bath :
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law of Bio mechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats are farthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, someone will call you and
the call will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor
covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are!

Law of Logical Argument*:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Lupton's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.


(* this one I've often experienced in aviation! ...."Chuck, is that you?")
If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet you could shoot beer out of you nose. --- Jack Handy

Offline tundra_flier

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #924 on: April 10, 2007, 07:58:38 PM »
(And there's a reason women don't need to do the same...  ahem....)    ;)

OH YEAH-RIGHT !!!  Now yer goin' ta lecture us about virtuous behavior, morals, etc, etc.---- ::banghead::

Naw, she just knows that when looking at a naked woman men don't really care what she calls us.   >:D   ::banghead::

Phil

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #925 on: April 10, 2007, 09:10:30 PM »
Ha ha Phil -- you're getting warmer!!  (No pun intended).

Actually, I am trying to get tuned back up for fire season, so am trying to see everything in a lewd and lascivious light..  heh heh...  it's required about as much as using a checklist, you know....

I just figured the sticky on the GUY's forehead would just say "Stupid".....

FIRE AWAY, I know I'm gonna get it for this one!!     ::rambo::   SHOOT HER, SHOOT HER.....

But -- like I said --- I gotta get tuned up for fire season...   pretty soon it'll be time to walk into the lions' den and take on the task of keeping up with 86 crazy jumpers............ 

Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline tundra_flier

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #926 on: April 11, 2007, 12:58:56 AM »
Then maybe you're implying that women just don't care who their in bed with  ::thinking::   ::cowboy::

Phil

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #927 on: April 11, 2007, 01:04:12 AM »
Naw...  but I'll admit, any guy who hangs around ME would have the "Stupid" sticker on his forehead..  I'll be honest here!!!!!!!     ::bow::
Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline tundra_flier

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #928 on: April 11, 2007, 02:07:07 AM »
Are you suggesting any guy would HAVE to be stupid to hang around with you?   ::silly::
Or that your sense of humor is such that you'd enjoy watching a guy walk around with a stupid sign on his forhead?  ::sulk::

Phil   ::cowboy::

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #929 on: April 11, 2007, 02:51:35 AM »
Oh dear....  Uhhhh...

Choice "C" -- ALL OF THE ABOVE!!!!    ::whistle::

 ;)    ;)    ;)    ;)    ;)    ;)    ;)
Don't make me come back there!!!!