Author Topic: Humor....I need Humor!  (Read 1403516 times)

Offline cotejy

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2040 on: February 05, 2009, 08:07:58 PM »
Quote
Long winters will do this to people.........

Long winters + a few guys getting drunk,... then someone will say the magic words: "I bet you can't do [insert_stupid_chalenge_here]".

Been there done that and had the chance not to be caught on camera... But once, I had the embarassing moment of explaining to a doctor that my 2 foots are burned because I won a bet.

Offline FlyboyGil

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2041 on: February 05, 2009, 10:28:13 PM »
Long winters will do this to people.........
"Snorkeling in Northern Ontario":

What? No one in any other countries do that? Looks like us Canucks are the only ones who know how to have fun!! ;D ;D ;D ::) ::)
IF YOU CAN'T SAY ANYTHING NICE, YOU'RE PROBABLY AT THE ICE CAPADES

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2042 on: February 06, 2009, 07:52:14 AM »
that brings on a diffrent meaning of a "skin dive".
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline Rooster Cruiser

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2043 on: February 06, 2009, 07:58:37 PM »
This comes from a search-and-rescue pilot at Canadian Forces Base, Bagotville, Québec. It allegedly happened late one night during bad weather, as heard over the tower radio:

First Voice (helicopter pilot):
"Roger, I'm holding at 3,000 over the beacon."

Second Voice (panicky):
"No, you can't be doing that — I'm holding at 3,000 over that beacon!"

[Brief pause.]

First Voice (again):
"You idiot — you're my co-pilot."
"Me and Earl was haulin' chickens / On a flatbed outta Wiggins..."

Wolf Creek Pass, by CW McCall

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2044 on: February 07, 2009, 07:53:23 AM »
Hmm  ::thinking:: 
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline Mike

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2045 on: February 07, 2009, 05:02:27 PM »
This comes from a search-and-rescue pilot at Canadian Forces Base, Bagotville, Québec. It allegedly happened late one night during bad weather, as heard over the tower radio:

First Voice (helicopter pilot):
"Roger, I'm holding at 3,000 over the beacon."

Second Voice (panicky):
"No, you can't be doing that — I'm holding at 3,000 over that beacon!"

[Brief pause.]

First Voice (again):
"You idiot — you're my co-pilot."


A helicopter at 3000ft ??  ::eek::

.....must be a fake ....


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Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2046 on: February 07, 2009, 05:04:05 PM »
Think you have too many 0's in there R/C  ::thinking::
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline Rooster Cruiser

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2047 on: February 08, 2009, 08:52:02 AM »
Think you have too many 0's in there R/C  ::thinking::

Perhaps the author of this little email to me put it in there, buddy.  I just did the ole' copy and paste routine.   ;) |:)\
"Me and Earl was haulin' chickens / On a flatbed outta Wiggins..."

Wolf Creek Pass, by CW McCall

Offline Ragwing

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« Reply #2048 on: February 11, 2009, 04:35:59 AM »
(1996, Canada) Sleeping residents of Chilliwack were awakened early one morning by the sound of a small aircraft flying lower than usual.
The engine noise was like a mosquito, zooming too close too quick, then veering away. What the bleep was going on?

In the wee hours of the night, during a bout of heavy drinking, two future Darwin Award nominees concluded that, with neither had a pilot's license nor flight training, they nevertheless knew enough to pilot an aircraft, knew all they needed to know to at a local dive.
They drew the obvious conclusion, and decided to take a plane from the small local airport for a drunken joyride over the city.
They invited two females along for the ride; fortunately, the level-headed ladies declined.

From idea to execution, the plan evolved quickly.
One of the gentlemen worked at the airport and had access to the tarmac.
The two men then managed to unlock a plane and get it off the ground and into the sky.
They went on to buzz around in the dark, skimming above the roofs of the houses.
This went on for an extended period of time.

Eventually they decided to land.
They attempted to land on the grassy median between east and west-bound lanes of the Trans Canada Highway.
They almost made it under the electrical wires that cross the median. Almost.
Where these wires were concerned, fate intervened.
Instead of making a soft landing on the grassy verge, the tail clipped the wires, sending the aircraft diving nose-first into the ground and killing both occupants.

Only then were the sleepy Chilliwack residents able to return to their REM sleep.
 ::silly:: ::sweat:: ::eek::
Ref:  http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2008-23.html

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2049 on: February 11, 2009, 04:53:37 AM »
Holy cow!!    ::unbelieveable::

But -- they COULD have been aspiring airline pilots..  I just heard on the radio last week, that the PASSENGERS on an Aeroflot flight saw that the Captain was obviously impaired.  Upon bringing it to the attention of the flight attendants, they were threatened and told to sit down, or the flight would be late.  They insisted on speaking to the entire flight crew..  after some arguing, they finally did so...  they said the Captain couldn't even stand up, but the CREW argued with the passengers that it didn't matter!

My favorite line from the whole exchange was something along the lines of "What difference does it make -- don't you know this thing can fly itself anyway??!!??!"

They finally won out and got the new crew they demanded, but the airline was furious at THEM for holding everything up.  WOW.

 ::)

 :o

(I can't recall the flight's destination -- it may have been the States -- but it happened in Decmeber '08, I believe...)
« Last Edit: February 11, 2009, 04:57:20 AM by TheSoccerMom »
Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline Ragwing

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2050 on: February 11, 2009, 05:34:37 AM »
Capt Cheplevsky emerged from the cockpit. Passengers alleged that he was red-faced, had bloodshot eyes and appeared unsteady on his feet.

Attempting to intercede in the dispute, he made passengers an offer, saying:
"I'll sit here quietly in a corner. We have three more pilots. I won't even touch the controls, I promise."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/russia/4448262/Aeroflot-says-drunk-pilot-no-big-deal.html

Offline Rooster Cruiser

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2051 on: February 11, 2009, 06:48:06 AM »
Holy Smokes!!!   ::unbelieveable:: ::unbelieveable:: ::unbelieveable::  I'm glad that hasn't happened on the Aeroflot flights I've been on!
"Me and Earl was haulin' chickens / On a flatbed outta Wiggins..."

Wolf Creek Pass, by CW McCall

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2052 on: February 11, 2009, 02:36:49 PM »
Ive been on some scary internal Aeroflot flights in my time still to tramatised to talk about them  ::sweat:: ::sweat::
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline ZK Kiwi

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2053 on: February 11, 2009, 07:35:36 PM »
According to the report on Avweb, blood tests showed no alcohol, they suspect the Pilot suffered a stroke of some sort.
If it was supposed to be easy, everyone would be doing it!

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #2054 on: February 11, 2009, 09:11:02 PM »
Well, whatever the hell was wrong with him, it shouldn't have taken a standoff to get a crew that was safe to fly.....  the flight attendants were quite angry and defensive, according to the interview with the passengers.

One passenger said the Captain fell against the side of the cabin while they were having their little "discussion".  He said the other crew members were propping him up.  That was before the crew fell upon their ultimate logical solution, of how the "airplane flies itself anyway".... 

Yeah, right......   ::loony::

 ::loony::
Don't make me come back there!!!!