Author Topic: Humor....I need Humor!  (Read 1378036 times)

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1800 on: May 20, 2008, 07:26:11 PM »
Aww, c'mon G-Man....

those wild ladies look to be just your type!!!!!!!!!   :D

 :D


 :D
Don't make me come back there!!!!

airtac

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1801 on: May 23, 2008, 02:32:03 PM »
Once upon a time there was this scud running Bucker pilot caught by nightfall's rapid approach with commensurately dwindling visibility, better find a field FAST! Our intrepid aviator at the last minute gets a glimpse of a field of new mown hay thru a hole in the clouds.

Relieved at his good fortune, he lands and taxis up to the nearby Farmhouse. The farmer comes out onto the front porch and sez, "You can spend the nite in the barn, but stay away from my daughter." As he laid down, starting to doze off, said daughter brought him a plate of supper. The conversation led to romance and the farmer's number one rule was broken.

As dawn broke our hero got long gone. Some seven years later, the pilot passed over the farm and decided to land and pay a visit. However, as he approached the house he saw a six-year-old boy standing in the front yard with the object of his former passion. The daughter, sensing his question said, "Yes, this is your son."

"Why didn't you let me know, I would've done the right thing," he said.

The daughter then replied, "We discussed it, even prayed about it, but in the end we thought it was better to have a bastard in the family than a pilot."

Offline Mike

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1802 on: May 23, 2008, 11:33:18 PM »
NICE!

I wonder now how my in-laws feel about me . . .  ::whistle::


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Offline RagDragger

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1803 on: May 24, 2008, 02:23:44 AM »
Ah, so that's why I can't get past the second date lately!  Now it all makes sense!
God looks out for drunks and dumb animals.  Fortunately, I qualify on both counts.

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1804 on: May 24, 2008, 07:15:03 AM »
this is a old email a friend of mine who lives some where in america sent me enjoy: Be sure to read to the end.

 

40 degrees- Californians shiver uncontrollably.

People in Scotland sunbathe.

 

35 degrees- Italian cars won't start.

People in Scotland drive with the windows down.

 

20 degrees- Floridians wear coats, gloves, and wool hats.

People in Scotland throw on a T-shirt.

 

15 degrees- Californians begin to evacuate the state.

People in Scotland go swimming.

 

Zero degrees- New York landlords finally turn up the heat.

People in Scotland have the last bbq before it gets cold.

 

10 degrees below zero- People in Miami cease to exist.

People in Scotland lick flagpoles.

 

20 degrees below zero- Californians fly away to Mexico.

People in Scotland throw on a light jacket.

 

80 degrees below zero- Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic.

Scottish Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets

cold enough.

 

100 degrees below zero- Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.

People in Scotland pull down their ear flaps.

 

173 degrees below zero- Ethyl alcohol freezes.

People in Scotland get frustrated when they can't thaw their kegs.

 

297 degrees below zero- Microbial life start to disappear.

Scottish cows complain of farmers with cold hands.

 

460 degrees below zero- ALL atomic motion stops.

People in Scotland start saying "chilly, you cald an aw?"

 

500 degrees below zero- Hell freezes over.

Scottish people support England in World Cup!!!!

 
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

airtac

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1805 on: May 24, 2008, 03:56:11 PM »
The Average American
>   > A recent study conducted by Harvard University found that the average
>   > American walks about 900 miles a year.
>   >
>   > Another study by the American Medical Association found that
>   > Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
>   >
>   > This means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
>   >
>   > Makes You Proud To Be An American.   |:)\
>
>   Want it to be known that pilots are not average in either catagory.   
>

Offline G-man

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1806 on: May 27, 2008, 02:24:27 PM »
Look at what I found--perfect for Soccermom and airtac ::whistle:: ::whistle::

Life may not be the party we hoped for---but while we're here--we might as well dance..........

Offline Rooster Cruiser

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1807 on: May 27, 2008, 02:38:34 PM »
G-Man, where do you come up with this stuff???  LMAO!!!
"Me and Earl was haulin' chickens / On a flatbed outta Wiggins..."

Wolf Creek Pass, by CW McCall

Offline G-man

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1808 on: May 27, 2008, 03:07:53 PM »
G-Man, where do you come up with this stuff???  LMAO!!!

Here--Been using the products for years.  ::whistle:: ::whistle:: ::drinking:: ::drinking::

http://washawayyoursins.com/

 ::whistle:: Purified and Moisturised ::whistle::

Actually I think this deserves its own thread..
Life may not be the party we hoped for---but while we're here--we might as well dance..........

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1809 on: May 27, 2008, 04:53:19 PM »
Here--Been using the products for years.  ::whistle:: ::whistle:: ::drinking:: ::drinking::

Hmmm.....    ::thinking::

Which means.....

they don't WORK.......    :D

 :D
Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1810 on: May 28, 2008, 11:47:21 AM »
previous talk of rednecks got me thinking and looked  this one out from my Far side collection......
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline 4X-NTY

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1811 on: May 28, 2008, 12:11:36 PM »
The new campaign of Israeli  Microsoft for recruiting new developers, and to think that some of those guys are the one who responsible for the most used operating system for PC...



this sign is standing at the middle of the most known junctions in Israel,so,please tell me,dose p=np?
Nitay "Pitz" Ronen

Offline Oddball

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1812 on: May 28, 2008, 03:27:23 PM »
Is this the place  where your 'jumper's  learn S'Mom?
"You can teach monkeys to fly better than that!"and "spring chicken to sh**e hawk in one easy lesson"

Offline TheSoccerMom

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1813 on: May 29, 2008, 02:29:10 AM »
Ha, I love that skydiving Far Side!!   ::rofl::

It might be better to learn next door to the Crocodile Farm....  talk about incentive.... 

Though, I dropped a bunch of little fires in Zion National Park one year, and THAT was some SERIOUS incentive not to miss....   ::unbelieveable::  They were landing on top of those incredible rock formations with the sheer cliffs on all sides.....  EEEEK!     ::eek::

 ::sweat::
Don't make me come back there!!!!

Offline Mike

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Re: Humor....I need Humor!
« Reply #1814 on: May 29, 2008, 03:15:46 AM »
Ha, I love that skydiving Far Side!!   ::rofl::

It might be better to learn next door to the Crocodile Farm....  talk about incentive.... 

Though, I dropped a bunch of little fires in Zion National Park one year, and THAT was some SERIOUS incentive not to miss....   ::unbelieveable::  They were landing on top of those incredible rock formations with the sheer cliffs on all sides.....  EEEEK!     ::eek::

 ::sweat::

we should post the video about the icebear jumping in Region 8, huh?!  ;D
I'll see if I can find it on youtube...


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